I have a very wonderful friend who was born and raised in Israel. I met her during my graduate studies and we became closer than sisters. Even though she returned to Israel and I don't get to see her nearly as often as I should, she still lives in my heart and I try to rely on pearls of wisdom she has given me over the years.
Once such pearl began with..."My goodness, you have the worst luck of anyone I know!" She said that her tradition says that sometimes bad luck becomes an uninvited guest in your home. What started out as a casual date with Bad Luck can turn into Bad Luck crashing on your couch, using your toothbrush and never washing his dishes! To root him out, she explained, you must go through your home and find "power objects" that no longer serve you. For example...bad luck with romance? Well are you holding on to your ex girlfriends flannel shirt from 10 years ago? Yes? Then get rid of it! Two car accidents in a month? Is there a speeding ticket from that road trip to Colorado five years ago still waiting to be paid? Pay it!
She suggested going through my entire house and looking for old love letters, broken totems, cracked buddhas, a concert stub from the time my girlfriend cheated on me with the bartender - and cleaning house! But you can't just throw these things away.....noooooooooooo! You have to return them, burn them, donate them, throw them out to sea...something that really allows you to "let go".
Periodically over the years I have scavenged through my house - because I am someone who really does put alot of power in silly objects. I really will save a t shirt from a former love just to keep that connection. And even though I hide it way way in the back of my closet...I sure know it's there. And according to old traditional Jewish folk wisdom, this is an open invitation to the bad luck fairy of love.
Now - giving back a shirt or a burning a love letter is one thing...but what about other things? A family engagement ring? A watercolor painting of tulips? Or...or...um...a sex toy? Yikes!
Ah that is tricky! What on earth could you do to ceremoniously "let go" of a dildo? God knows it hasn't seen any action since our country actually had an economic surplus...but what they heck should be done with it? (Holy cow I am imagining the google searches that are hitting this blog post by mistake with those keywords). You can't burn silicone hot enough to melt it! You certainly shouldn't mail it back to your ex and her happy wife! So through all my purging - the dildo remained. But today, being yet another solitary Valentines Day, I was so determined to turn my dating luck around that I racked my brain until it hit me! The plan would require some bravery, luck, and a friend to keep look out (but then again all good plans require such!).
Look closely at the photo and you will see the shelf of a local Goodwill. Baskets and dishes, a duck teacup of some sort and shirts. Look a bit closer and you will see, a formerly adored sex toy nestled in with other housewares. And for the low low price of $3.99 this item can be YOURS! Because bad luck to me could be hours of fun for the next owner! My icky juju escaped the moment I slapped a price tag on it and placed it on the shelf!
And perhaps, today's healing hijinx will be just what I need to kick that bad luck love fairy out of my house for GOOD! As my friend and I were heading out the door, elated and self satisfied, we spied a young lesbian couple walking in...perhaps shopping for some valentines day spice - but on a budget!
