today.
driving around feeling like a woman who hasn't slept or eaten or had ANY CAFFEINE for days and days and days...
A poor, pitiful woman in the horrible limbo after discovering it is time for a referral to a specialist but before the cardiologist has an opening...
going through the motions and being pretty proud of myself for doing that. Being brave for my kid and my family and my friends.
so basically today was a lot like yesterday :)
I pulled up to a stop light and waited patiently for my turn. I closed my eyes just for a second - really just a blink - and saw (in my mind) a little Honda rush across the cross street and nearly run off the road in front of me. It was as clear as if it had been real.
But when I opened my eyes I was alone at the stop light.
So when the light turned green I was scared to go. I slowly edged into the intersection as I saw a little Honda barreling up the road. I stopped immediately as the careless dude nearly smashed into my car, screeching his tires and swerving up onto the sidewalk.
I pulled into a nearby parking lot, kind of overcome by what had just happened.
Honestly my first thought was "God saved me!!". And my second thought was "just to make sure I stay good and heartbroken". I laughed to myself thinking that all the evangelical Christians were right and God was keeping the gays and lesbians around just to make them miserable. Which I admit is an absurd thought...right?
Mellow-dramatic? hyperbole? Same difference.
Tomorrow I will work on being grateful for the warning today. I will pick up my son from school and hug him mighty tight and then get a kitten. Or a tattoo. Or both.
